Having Trouble Finding Black Singles At Church

There are a lot of things that you need to know about Christian dating online before getting into the intricacies of it.

Online dating may seem to be the simplest thing in the world but it is not. It should be viewed in all earnestness or things could get very ugly very fast.

Every game has rules. And unless you know the rules you won’t become a good player— or a winner.

For instance, look around you. How many people look the same?

Sizes, builds, shapes, features, they’re all so different. And that’s just the external appearance. But when it comes to character, it becomes a very different story altogether.

Think about high school. You interacted with a lot of different people and you got to know many of them one on one.

So how many of your classmates did you genuinely like? Were they easy to get along with? Of course not. That’s why we end up with best friends or in a certain clique.

As Christians, the same principle applies. The Bible tells us to love one another, but it doesn’t say we have to LIKE one another. After all, we’re only human.

When it comes to Christian dating, it’s the same story. Most people go on dates with a very definite purpose—to find a compatible Christian mate.

But there are many things that should match before two people decide to spend the rest of their lives with each other. And sometimes, a little help is warranted.

That’s why this website is here—it‘s a how-to for the thousands of Christian singles who are either thinking about or actively involved in internet dating.

And I promise you this: If you follow the guidelines presented here and be open to God’s direction, you’ll get more out of your online dating experience than you ever thought possible!

So why To Go With Christian Online Dating?

Typically, Christian singles have had one main source for a potential mate: the church. And millions of successful relationships have spawned from churches worldwide.

But in today’s world, differing interpretations of the Christian faith have fragmented the traditional church body. The result is smaller churches with fewer members. And there are less singles.

So it’s getting harder and harder for Christian singles to meet like-minded people. And they’re turning to other alternatives, namely online dating.

Online dating has been extremely popular over the past few years. Millions of singles from all over the globe have found love and happiness through online dating. But many have been jilted by the same process, including Christians.

Getting Real With Christian Online Dating

When searching for a potential Christian mate, chalk out a list of qualities that you genuinely dislike in a person. Dislikes are just as important, or even more important than likes. We all have to make compromises here and there, but if you start condoning things which you genuinely dislike, your relationship will quickly be on the road to ruin.

Word of caution: Many people make the mistake of always accommodating the other when courting. They’re constantly adjusting to the other’s wishes. Though it’s proper to be nice, there’s a point when you have to say, “No more”. Remember—this isn’t just a temporary trip you’re thinking about taking with this person; this is the rest of your life.

If it’s something you’re very particular about, stick to your guns. And if you think you’ll be able to change this person out of his or her offending habits, think again. The moment you start, it becomes ‘nagging’ and he or she will love you less for it.

I once started seriously dating a woman who I later realized was very cold and hardened inside. I desperately tried to change her to a softer, more kindly spirit, but it wasn’t to be. Needless to say, that relationship was doomed from the start and didn’t last long.

It’s best to have a clear idea about qualities and habits that you genuinely dislike and steer clear of those who possess these traits. Once you do this, you’re in a better position to make the right choice.

And please don’t obsess over making a wrong choice. There’s a multitude of Christian singles out there in the Christian dating sites, and if you are taking the right steps, the Lord will show you the right one. Don’t forget to include God’s input every step of the way. He’ll take care of the details IF you let Him. Remember: If God be for us, who can be against us?
Here’s a great tip to take some of the pressure out of dating online: Don’t look at it as a prospective partner hunt. See it as a new way to make a lot of friends, and I mean good friends.
Good friends make your life richer. You can be yourself with them, and they can be themselves with you. And that means letting it all out.

We must remember that apart from being a Christian husband or wife, your spouse should be your best friend as well.

Many couples make this mistake: They tend to separate their friends and their spouses. While it is perfectly acceptable (and healthy) to have your own friends, your best friend should always be your husband or wife.

This is the person you’ll share your dreams and fears with, someone who understands, someone who can give your hand a gentle squeeze when things go wrong and brighten up your darkest day.

Speaking of marriage, here’s a worst case scenario: What do you do if you discover that one of your new online friends is already married?

That’s easy: thank the Lord for His revelation, break off all contact with them and run as fast as you can in the other direction. These people have serious problems. If they’re a married Christian, why would they be perusing dating websites? They’re obviously looking for an adulterous relationship. And you don’t want to be anywhere near them.

Christian Online Dating Services: Where Do I Start

First and foremost, do not go straight away into a Christian singles’ chat room and try to find somebody who would interest you. Many of these chat rooms are flooded with people who are only looking for sex. (Yes, even the Christian ones.) Finding the kind of person who matches your interests and tastes can be very difficult. There are many Christian dating sites where you can find your perfect pair..

Chat rooms can really be infuriating. Everything starts off well. You’re having a nice conversation when all of the sudden, the topic moves into an intimate area. You sigh and have to bar messages from that person, who may choose to bad mouth you in the chat room. Usually you have to leave the chat room all together.

Instead of bothering with Christian singles chat rooms, why not try a different angle? Like working backwards?

Take a moment and think about the things that interest you and things that you would find interesting in another single Christian. And by ‘things’, I am not referring to physical attributes.
Again the distinction has to be drawn between a serious relationship and a casual relationship. In a casual relationship, there may be an increased importance on physical attributes. But in a serious relationship, the physical qualities are probably not as important.

There are certain qualities that you will obviously be looking out for. First on your list should be a growing relationship with the Lord. After that, things like character and attitude should rank high. Remember—beauty is only skin deep, but the important things last for a lifetime!

Did you know that it is possible to grow to like a person’s looks? After you see how wonderful they are on the inside, you’ll start liking the outside as well. It is entirely possible to fall in love with someone who doesn’t look Brad Pitt or Catherine Zeta-Jones.

I knew a Missionary couple who were married for many years. The wife has told us point blank that she did not love her husband when they married. But she knew without a doubt that this was the man God wanted her to be with. In time, a deep love grew between them and they
accomplished many wonderful things on the mission field.

What if she had followed her own feelings instead of the Lord’s will? Many souls who would have been saved would be lost.
Looks may be important, but they certainly are not the most important thing and should never be used as the deciding factor in a serious relationship.

You need to find some common ground

We weren’t created like clear pieces of glass you can look through. God made us more like diamonds, which when held against light reflects a myriad of colors. We’re extremely complex.
And with this in mind, it stands to reason that your interests will not necessarily match those of another. But thankfully, these interests are not as numerous as the people who have them. So you’re bound to find a lot of people who you’re compatible with.

What are your interests? Give this some serious thought. There might be a lot of things that you enjoy doing but have never really realized it.

Do you like sports or outdoor activities? How about social work? Maybe you’re into crossword puzzles or old movies. Just keep jotting them down as they come to you.

Your tastes and interests could be very different. But that’s okay. Let them be. Once you have decided what your interests are then a good portion of the hard work is done.

Now comes the fun part. Sit and think about what you would like in another person. But remember, having the same interests doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll get along famously.
For example, if you’re a talker, it doesn’t mean that you would care for another person who’s a talker as well. Two people constantly trying to talk at the same time can only end in disaster. On the other hand, if you’re the silent, reserved type and the other person is the same, then you’ll never communicate properly!

The word here is “compatible.” Your interests should complement theirs and not clash.

Christian Online Dating: You Can Find True Love Too

Adam had everything he wanted in the garden, Food, Comfort, Direct fellowship with God. But still he was lonely.

Eve entered. That’s the way God has made us. We’re social beings. And we are also lonely beings. We long for company.

Company not just from friends and family, but from the special person that God has for us. Someone with whom we can share simple pleasures and pains. Someone with whom we can build a life and raise a family with.

It’s a fundamental need inside all of us to find a life mate. That’s why we date. It’s the first step towards choosing God’s perfect life partner and Christian online dating can make the whole process a lot simpler.

But you need to make a choice: Partner or Pal?

Before you begin dating online, you need to establish exactly what you want: just friends or a potential mate.

If a casual relationship is what you desire, you’ll only be looking for other Christian friends. So in this scenario, you’ll obviously be searching for another Christian single that’s not inclined towards establishing a serious relationship.

If both parties understand this clearly from the get-go, it leaves no room for heartbreak.
But when one party is looking for something more serious and the other party just wants to be friends, that’s where problems start. So you should be very candid about what you are looking for from the very beginning, making your intentions absolutely clear.

At the same time you should have no doubts about the intentions of the other person. Remember, even if it is a casual relationship, there should be mutual understanding about the nature of the relationship.

Of course, there’s always the possibility of a friendship blossoming into something more serious. That’s what happened with my wife, Ronda, and I.

We were both part of a large singles group in our church. At the time, she was involved in a long distance relationship and I had my eye on several prospects in our group.

Because we’re both very social people, we became good friends very quickly. Our phone conversations would last for hours and it always seemed like we’d end up sitting next to each other during service.

Then something funny happened. As I got to know her better, I saw an inner beauty inside of her shining like a light. And I became more interested.

Eventually, her long distance relationship fizzled (who says God doesn’t answer prayer) and I was the sympathetic friend. I waited until I felt the time was right, and then made my move…
…and she turned me down flat.

She wasn’t really ready for anything else just yet. No problem. I understand. So I waited a few more weeks, then asked again.

Her answer? Yep, you guessed it. Another no. Still not ready.

Okay, by this time, I’m starting to get a little frustrated. Maybe she really doesn’t want to date me. So I left her alone and began concentrating my efforts on other prospects.

A few weeks later, we had our singles group Christmas party. Ronda, the consummate coordinator, was working like a mad woman trying to make sure everything went off exactly as planned. I was helping in any way I could, but was also spending a considerable amount of time chatting with several young ladies in attendance.

Apparently, she took notice. After the dinner, Ronda was asked to lead the group (around 100 people) in some Christmas carols. Exhausted from the evening’s activities, it was the last thing she wanted to do. But being people pleaser that she is, she said yes anyway.

As we sang, her eyes eventually met mine and I instinctively winked and smiled at her. I knew it had been a rough evening, and it was my way of saying, “You’re doing great kiddo. Keep it up.”
But what I DIDN’T know until later was that, with my wink and smile, Ronda had an epiphany. In her words, “I realized that this was a totally wonderful man who was very interested in me and I couldn’t even see it. It was an IQ test, and I was flunking.”

Shortly afterwards, we were looking for our coats and she casually asked me what I was doing Friday night.

Take Care While You Are Using Online Dating Sites

The fate of online dating relationships is very uncertain and people who are interested in getting into these relationships are not much keen to spend a hell lot of money just at the beginning of their relations. A huge lot of people try the World Wide Web to search dating options for their life and search their life partners for entering into relations like marriage. Not that money is important than their relationship but spending money for a relation that has no direction doesn’t really make sense.

If you too are one of those many that do not have much idea about whom to connect to find that special someone for you, browse on the net. There are numerous different websites offering free services to help you find the right kind of person for your life.

For starters free online dating sites are prefect to start with. These charge no fees for online dating and the user can take number of trials to learn. Free trial membership and dating free of cost are offered at these sites. Some online dating sites are free initially and have upgrade options available for future use by the users. The acceptance and rejection of these upgrade options depends solely on the users. Compare the advantages and disadvantages of being a free or paid member before you actually use the options for future

Easy Way To Identify The Forgery Dating Website:

A simple search on the search engines will present before you a long list of these online dating sites. It is you who will have to decide on the site that will be used by you for searching your dating partner. Not all dating sites are created in similar manner and not all of them may have similar features. Find the perfect site for yourself and sign up for free dates. Make sure that you do not reveal personal information on these sites as it may be misused. Use your e-mail id for the purpose of signing up as revealing other information on these sites will lead you to problems.
The first thing that you should do after signing up an online dating site is to create your profile. This will help people to learn more about you. But, be cautious before you reveal any information on the internet. You will get numerous chances to share information later. Online dating will help you meet several people that you might be interested in or those who might find interest in you. The choice is all yours.

Make A Perfect Date For Yourself By Going Through The Dating Website

You can make a perfect date for yourself by using the Online Dating websites. There are many dating sites that are available online for blacks but make sure that you are choosing the dating website on the internet. Once you selected the dating website there are many tips that you should do to make your dating successful. Here are some of the tips.

Dating Rule 1: Be yourself

The most important of all relationships in life is the relationship with self. How significant a relation may be for you but keep yourself at the top on your priority list and most important be yourself. Learn to love yourself and identify then good qualities in you. Learn to have a strong self esteem and a sense of self-worth.

Dating Rule 2: Make your date fun filled

Fill your date with fun, humor and excitement. A flavor of these elements not only makes the date happy but also makes you feel good about both yourself and your partner. These things help to initiate attraction between you and your partner. Studies and researches have shown that the amount of fun element on the date determines the success rate of the date and the relationship.

Dating Rule 3: Exchange your views clearly and unambiguously.

Clear, unambiguous and strong communication is the key to a healthy and successful communication. So exchange your views about everything clearly and give your partner a chance to place his or her views and opinions as well. Communication is like a bridge that makes a date successful and joins partners for long periods of time. It helps to create a space for love and intimate relationships for life. Only with clear communication, partners who are attached romantically can live up to their relationships for life.

Dating Rule 4: Learn to negotiate

Sometimes you might feel that communication alone is insufficient to save your relationship from violent and turbulent times, negotiation needs to come to play from both the partners. There might be several issues standing upfront to break love and intimate relationship of years but proper negotiation on both the sides has the capability to save a relationship in these turbulent times. Both partners must be willing to and capable of negotiation.

Dating Rule 5: Cherish your relationship

Once you are in a relationship the most important and the first on your priority should to nurture your relationship. Tender love and care are necessary to make your dating relationships require care in order to prosper and succeed. Continuous appreciation, attention to each other, respect, kindness and reciprocity towards your partner will help improve your relationship.

Make A Perfect Date From The One You Choose From The Online Dating Website This Valentine’s Day

The act of going out regularly with someone special –a romantic partner is a combination of arts and sciences along with the special significance to the time factor. If you care for your partner’s time and reach to meet him or her before the decided time it adds to your relationship. If you learn to manage all the above elements you would definitely be successful in managing your relationship. With time it will grow strong healthy and exciting.

You can find your perfect date from dating website to go for date on the Valentine’s day.

Choose a special day to take your would-be for that special first date. Valentine’s Day can be the perfect day to go for a date with that special someone. But do not forget to take care of these small things before you celebrate your valentine’s day together. If your partner is fond of viewing your mail messages choose an e-card and send it to her in advance. If she or he is not an e-maniac don’t forget to buy an actual card for him or her for this special occasion. Do but a special gift for her this valentine and this becomes especially important if it is his or her first date with you.

Your gift to her should be special

Flowers and chocolates are common on Valentine’s Day but might be a part of your gift depending upon your partner’s choice. Try to make this gift special for her so that he or she feels special and remembers you throughout life. Gift her tickets for the special event that she might have communicated to you online. This will make him or her feel, happy.

Gift her or him a lovely experience

A lovely experience on the Valentine’s Day is even more important than a packaged gift which she might pack in the wardrobe. Plan before hand for an experience along with a lovely well thought out gift. An evening with your partner’s hand in yours under the cool moonlight along the beach would be a lovely and memorable experience for both of you. Go for a movie and make the day remembered for long. Get a hot air balloon for you and your partner and go for a lovely ride high up in the sky.

Surprises your partner

Surprises bring a lot of excitement in your relationship. This will maintain the passion and excitement in your relationship. You will feel more attached to your partner in this way and your relationship grows well.

Your partner should be your focus point

Make him or her feel that no one else is more important to you than your partner. This will create a special place for you in the other person’s heart and mind.

Finding The Striking Up Interesting Dating Conversations

You are on a date. You start off fine, you even find some great compliments for her. But then, half way through, none of you can find anything else to talk about. Nothing could be worse than running dry on your conversation on your date.

The rest of your date will drift by slowly, marked by a few unsuccessful attempts to start a new conversation alternating between stretched out periods of silence. By the time, your date ends, both of you know that you are not going to see the other again. So this becomes too unsuccessful, after all you would have spent your bunch of valid time in your online dating to find the right dating pair and all would be wasted within a short span of time.

Awkward silences are killers anywhere, but especially so for dating. Besides, you bear the loss of not only a potential relationship but also an evening. The worst part is that most dates could have done without such silences.

You need to understand this. A date is no way different compared to any other element of your life. Whatever you are doing, it is simply not possible that you have nothing to say or nothing to talk about.

In case, you find that you are running out of anything to talk, then go for some easy topic. Focus on your date, where you are eating or what you are eating. You can talk about what you feel about the food or the ambience or the movie that just watched.

Once you get started, you will soon branch out into other areas and before long, and you will be complaining that time is flying. An interesting way to gauge the quality of your conversation is to see how much laughter is there between you. Both of you are laughing means that you are comfortable with each other and are enjoying each other’s company.

If there is anything worse than an awkward stretched silence, then it is either of you trying too hard to break the silence, you can make stupid jokes, talk about useless stuff and make a complete fool of yourself.

Now, you should know to differentiate between silences; while they can be awkward, they can also be reflective or comfortable. A comfortable or reflective silence is in fact, even better than laughter when it comes to predicting the outcome of your date; you can certainly expect many positive things out of this date.

The worst thing you can do to break the silence is to go on and on about how good and wonderful you happen to be. While it is alright to talk a bit about yourself, you should also remember to keep including your date in. You should leave them out.

If you happen to notice that your date is keeping too quiet, then you can start an open conversation so that they can get involved.

The Must Thing You Should Forget When It Comes To Online Dating

There are many people who create a great profile in the online dating websites they do good online chats but when they go out for the date for the first time there occurs a problem.
How often have you thought that I will speak this time or I will do this or that for sure, only to be stopped by your shyness? It is interesting how shyness can be such a problem that it can cause you to miss out on several interesting and fun things in life.

If you are a shy person then you would rather stay at home and watch TV than go out and talk with other people. This is exactly what keeps shy people from dating.

Shy people usually do not speak too much or speak too little when among many people, especially strangers and hence, people may write them off as boring or unfriendly. However, the fact is that shyness does not in the least define whether or not you are boring or interesting, or whether you are friendly or not.

In case of shy people, friends can be of a great help. They can help you out of your own world. If you do not particularly enjoy hitting night clubs or places where you might have to interact with other people, then you can take the help of your friends.

You can go to attend some class or even go for shopping. While it may take quite some effort on your part, having a nice outgoing friend with you will surely help you get over your shyness.
Women often perceive shy men as boring or unattractive. Hence, before the man gets the chance to show who he really is, he is written off.

You can attend some classes or groups that focus on the subject that you intend to pursue. This is a good place to begin because not only will you be able to meet people here, you will get enough time to feel confident and be able to talk with them easily.

Above all, you will be able to be in a place where you are surrounded by people who share the same interest with you. Even if you do not find anyone whom you like in particular, you still are doing something that you enjoy doing. Thus, there is no loss in such a situation. If see someone you like, you can easily start a conversation with her, knowing she is in the same class with you.
Approach her calmly and nicely. You do not want to scare her. As far as possible, be natural and act normal. It might be hard for the first time, however, once you get used to it, you will find it easier.
Remember, there will be many other obstacles also when you happen to find someone. However, remain confident and secure in yourself.

Girls like to be liked and wanted for who they are and not for their bodies alone. If you are shy, you know this better than anyone else does. After all, you too want to liked for who you are in spite of your shyness.

Best Tip To Promote Your Black Dating ProfileBest Tip To Promote Your Black Dating Profile

How To Use Blogs To Date?

Blogs are the coolest new thing in the web world. People are learning the power of blogs. You can use them for just about anything; write your thoughts, sell something, gripe about your life, create a group, discuss, and even date. You can start your own blog and it will not cost you a dime. It is not complex to set up a blog or maintain it. It is much like an online diary that everybody will be able to read.

Here are a few basics about you can put your blog to good use for dating.

How to create your blog?

There is hardly anything easier than this. It is simple. All you do is go to blogspot.com or some other similar site and open your free account. They will guide through all steps and it generally includes giving your blog a name, giving your details if you want to and such other stuff. It is very much like opening an email account.

Then what???

While it is simple enough to start a blog, your real job begins now. You should take care what you put on your blog, especially if you are going to use it for dating. You can put your own pictures (the good ones, of course!), if you want to. So if you include your blog details in your profile of online dating all who are interested in your profile will come and will have a look at your blog to know more about you.

Now, you can begin by making your blog something like an online diary. Here you can write about what you did today or you can write on something that you like to do or even collect some kind of weird stories or news or pictures and post them. Basically, whatever you want to.
You can write down your profile well. Be honest here, creating a false picture never helps.
You can write just about anything you want to. If you are a music lover, then post your favourite songs or things like that. Write something that interests you. This way you will not get bored of maintaining your blog and people who have similar interests, as yours will visit your blog. Thus, you will get someone who already has interests same as you.

You can base your blog on a particular theme too, if you want to. However, then you will have to keep writing about similar stuff, but if you enjoy the theme then keep to it.

The don’ts of writing on a blog

Well, while you can write anything you want to on your blog, you should remember that you are looking for a date here. There is no point in scaring off your potential date by writing depressing or even angry things.

Just think, who would want to spend half an hour reading about how bad your life is because you do not have any partner with you or even how boring your job is?